Late
by You'reBrainySmurf
Summary: She was a logical person. Science and rationality all the way, not one to jump to conclusion but always open to every possibility. And distinctly aware of the likelihood or unlikelihood of each.
1. Prologue

**I know this idea has been done before, but I couldn't help myself. Maybe you guys could stick with it for a while? *hopeful smile* Oh, and in case anyone was wondering I don't own this show.**

**CHAPTER ONE **

She was a logical person. Science and rationality all the way, not one to jump to conclusion but always open to every possibility. And distinctly aware of the likelihood or unlikelihood of each.

So when her period was one day late, she barely even dwelled on it. Her cycle had never been completely regular anyway. It didn't come the next day either – not terribly worrying. The day after that, at lunchtime, she remembered that Angela had taken a tampon from her purse a couple of weeks ago and she hadn't replaced it, so all she felt was relief about her missed period.

She was just leaving her apartment on the fourth day when she remembered to run back into the bathroom and grab a couple of tampons. And as she stuffed them into her bag she finally realized that she was _four days late_.

Her mind jumped to pregnancy for one terrified second before she shook herself back into reality. She was careful with her birth control pills. And there are many other reasons for a late period, right?

Had she miscalculated? A quick check to her calendar saw two small red dots on the 23rd of last month – her last period had been thirty-two days ago.

With an annoyed huff, she left her home and headed to the lab, pushing the subject out of her mind.

-----

"You okay, Bones?"

The curious inquiry pulled her from her troubled thoughts only for a moment, the moment that it took for her to glance at him in the driver's seat and mutter a, "Yes, fine."

"You sure?" He grinned boyishly and continued in a sing-song voice, one he hoped inspired happy, cheerful thoughts in his partner, "You've been very quiet today…"

Brennan sighed and sat up in her seat, absently rubbing her forehead with her hand.

"I'm late," She admitted.

"Late? For what?"

"My period is late, Booth. I haven't menstruated this mon-"

"Whoa, okay, okay! Bones, this," He gestured embarrassedly. "This is something you talk about with Angela, okay? Not with me. Your partner. Your _male _partner who knows nothing about…Being late," he mumbled.

"What?" She asked defensively. "I'm sure you know that every woman goes through a menstrual cycle and that I, as a woman, do so as well. I don't see why it's so surprising to you. Besides, you asked."

Booth was silent for a while, a blush rising up his neck and settling on his cheeks.

"You're right, I'm sorry," He said, and in a condescending tone that let her know he clearly _wasn't _sorry and he clearly _didn't _believe she was right. "I just don't feel comfortable talking about…Cycles..." He coughed, "With you."

"Fine."

He waited patiently, knowing that in a few minutes she would start up again.

Dr. Brennan didn't disappoint.

"You know, there are many perfectly plausible reasons for a late period other than pregnancy. Stress, for example, or a change in schedule. I had a cold last week," She pointed out, as if daring him to challenge her. "Illness can throw off the cycle too."

"I believe you, Bones."

"Yes, you should," She said, her eyes wide, almost pleading. "Because I'm right," She continued after a long pause.

"Besides, I'm on birth control."

"Good for you," He said absently, his eyes on the road, trying hard not to pay attention to her.

"There's only about a 0.2 chance of someone getting pregnant on birth control pills."

"Bones," He sighed exasperatedly, turning to face her for a second. "You're not pregnant, alright? Stop worrying."

"I know. I'm not worrying."

"Good. Because you're not pregnant. You just listed a whole bunch of reasons why."

"Yes," She nodded, swallowing. "There's no way I'm pregnant."

"Besides, you're not even seeing anybody."

Brennan frowned for a moment, confused. "What? What does that have to do with anything?"

"Well," Booth cleared his throat uncomfortably. "You usually need to, ah…Well, it usually takes _two _people to make a woman pregnant. And you're, um, only one. Person. Only one person."

"Well I'm not _seeing _anybody, but that doesn't mean I haven't had intercourse in the past couple months or so."

"What, that deep-sea guy?" He chuckled. "He didn't seem like the type of guy who would risk throwing away a future full of sexy Hawaiian hula dancers by forgetting his protection for one night."

"He doesn't work in Hawaii, Booth. He stays just off the coast of-"

"Fine, fine, Bones. You get my point," He paused. "Probably."

"I do, but I don't understand. I already told you I'm on the pill, he knew that too. We're not that careful with extra protection."

"_What?! _You're kidding, right? That guy? No protection? With _that_ _guy_? Bones! He's like…He's…He's a walking STD! Anyone can see that!"

"Booth, it's very unfair to judge someone based on looks alone. You barely spoke two words to him. And I've known him since college; I know that he's clean."

"Oh was he _welding _back then, too?" He asked, not sure why exactly the dumb comment slipped out of his mouth.

Brennan gave him a confused look and answered, "No. He was studying engineering. He got the job right after college because his parents passed away and he had to take care of his younger siblings."

"How noble," Booth replied, rolling his eyes.

"I think so, too," Booth spared a glance at his partner and had to resist the urge to throw up at the almost dreamy look on her face. Temperance Brennan did not get dreamy looks on her face over guys. What was going on here?

"So, ah…You really like this guy, do you?"

"Well I did enjoy him, until he broke up with me."

Booth was silent for a moment, contemplating her use of the phrase _'enjoy him.' _

"Right. Sorry about that."

"Why? It's not your fault."

He paused, and then sighed. "I still can't believe you didn't use protection with that guy."

"I didn't say that I didn't use a condom," She clarified, clearly tired of the conversation. Booth flinched. "What? Are you uncomfortable with the word _condom_, Booth?" The woman teased, smirking.

"No," He lied thinly. "So you _did _use…protection?"

"Probably. But it's _possible _that I didn't. We weren't that careful," She said absentmindedly, staring out the window. "You know, sometimes you just can't wait for him to run to the bathroom and get a-"

"Okay, Bones, okay! I get it."

**Reviews, please?? I'll try to update soon!**


	2. Confirmation

** I know some people are very sensitive about the topic of abortion, so I believe I should warn you all that it is mentioned in this chapter. I am in no way injecting my own opinion into the story, so please nobody get defensive – this is just how I think the characters would feel about the subject. **

**CHAPTER TWO**

"Still late?" Booth teased four days later, walking into his partner's office to find her at her table with her head in her hands. "Maybe it's time for a doctor's appointment. Or a home pregnancy test. I'll even run out and get it for you," He grinned. "And pay, too."

"Booth…" She raised her head and looked at him. "What if I am?"

The teasing smirk dropped from his face and he walked closer to her. "It's – what? A 99.8% chance that you're _not _pregnant, Bones? I think the odds are in your favour."

"But it's not a hundred. What if I'm in the .2 percentage? It wouldn't be completely unbelievable…"

"Maybe you should just make sure and get it over with. Then you can stop worrying. And maybe go to your…Ah, girly doctor. And find out _why _you're…Late."

Brennan nodded, sniffling quietly even though she wasn't crying. "But what if I am?"

"Then…" He breathed in deeply and placed his hand on her shoulder. "Then you are. We'll deal, Bones. _You'll_ deal. You always do."

"There's always abortion," She said, shrugging.

Booth stepped away and swallowed awkwardly. _No. Don't start anything, this is her choice and will always be her choice. Your opinion doesn't matter. _"Yeah…Th-there's always that."

She looked up at him, puzzled. "You'd be…Uncomfortable with that choice?"

"I…"

The doc raised her eyebrows expectantly.

"Yes, I would be, Bones. But it's your choice."

"A fetus' heart doesn't start beating until around the fifth week. It's not really a _person _until-"

"You don't even know how far along you are!" He exclaimed, immediately knowing it was the wrong thing to say. Her eyes widened and her face paled, obviously terrified.

"I'm not pregnant," She said quickly.

"You don't know that," Booth replied, unable to stop himself. "You said so yourself, you could be in the .2 percent!"

"It's a .2 percent chance!" Brennan yelled.

"But it's _possible_! What other reason could there be for your…Lateness?!"

"I _told _you, there are a lot of other-"

"I know, I know. Stress, sickness, whatever," He sighed. "You know what, Bones? I _am _going out to get you a test. Then we can stop arguing."

"No," She said, standing up. "No, no, I don't want you to."

"What, so you're never going to find out? Why wait if you can just do it today?"

"Why do it today if I can just wait?" She countered pleadingly, knowing it was a childish response.

"Bones…You're going to have to find out sometime."

"_Sometime_. Not today," Brennan tugged on his arm to stop him from leaving. "Please, Booth, I don't want to know right now."

"Why? It's a .2 percent chance. You know we're both being paranoid to even _think _that you could be pregnant," He chuckled. "Just get it over with."

-----

"Thank you," Brennan quickly took the brown paper bag from Booth's outstretched hands.

He smiled and stared at her anxiously. "So? You gonna take it right now?"

"You know, Booth, I really don't appreciate how cavalier you're being about this. The results of these tests could change my whole life," She glared at him.

"Sorry, sorry," The agent raised his arms defensively. "And I only got one – there's no _tests_. Those things cost a fortune, you know."

Brennan rolled her eyes and sat back down at her desk.

"So? Go take the test, Bones," He urged.

"I'm not taking it now. Forget about it. I'll take it when I get home."

"Aw, Bones. You're such a party pooper."

She glanced up at him and frowned. "I don't know what that means."

"Of course you don't, Bones. Well, I don't think we'll be seeing each other today. No new cases. So – bye. G'luck with the test. Call me after you take it."

A few minutes after her partner left, Brennan glanced up at the door to make sure that nobody was looking into her office and quickly snatched the paper bag from the edge of the table. She opened it apprehensively and took out the bright blue box, dropping onto her lap so that there was no risk of anyone seeing it through the open door.

She examined the box carefully. _Clearblue easy – over 90% accurate. _Turning it over, Brennan read the instructions, her breathing a little bit shallow.

"Hey Bren," Angela said cheerily, walking inside and sitting down on her friend's couch.

The blue box rattled in her hands, nearly falling to the floor. "Ange," She smiled nervously. "You startled me."

"Whatcha got there?" The woman asked curiously, raising her head to look over the table.

"No. Nothing," She quickly shoved it back into the paper bag and turned back to her friend. "Is there something you need?"

"Yeah, a case," Angela pouted childishly. "I'm normally all for a decrease in this city's crime rate, but…I'm bored."

"I'll bring up some cases from Bone Storage later."

"Yeah, alright…" Ange answered dejectedly. "That FBI agent of yours better bring us something good soon, though. I'm getting restless," She smirked. "And you know that's never good."

Brennan smiled back, still a little jumpy over nearly getting caught. "Yes, I understand. Although it's not really up to Booth if we get any new cases or not. He's not the one committing murders."

"Right, sweetie," Angela smiled good-naturedly at her friend's nit-picky attitude. "Well, I should go," She stood up. "I have an internet date."

Brennan drew her eyebrows together, confused, but kept her mouth shut. She really only wanted to be alone.

-----

Temperance walked into her apartment tiredly, throwing her keys into the bowl next to the door and dropping down onto the couch. She zipped down her boots with one hand and draped her jacket over the arm of the sofa with the other, then lied down on her side and sighed.

It was time, she knew. It couldn't be put off any longer. While she knew that most likely her late period had nothing to do with pregnancy, her heart beat faster and faster with each passing minute, knowing by tomorrow morning she'd be making an appointment with her gynecologist – either a harmless check-up to see if her lateness was anything serious, or a pre-natal visit.

After a few minutes of lying down and staring at the ceiling, trying to calm her rapidly beating heart, Brennan sat up and brought her bag up to her lap. She fished around inside for the Clearblue box and then headed to the bathroom quickly, before she could change her mind.

The instructions were simple enough – Remove the cap from the absorbent tip and hold under urine stream for 5 seconds. Make sure the entire tip is wet, keep it facing downward and replace the cap, then wait for results.

She held the plastic contraption as far away from herself as she could, waiting with baited breath for the outcome.

And there it was – plain as day. Brennan threw the test into the waste basket and walked out into the living room, numb.

She picked up the phone and dialed the number that was as familiar to her as her own.

"Bones?" He answered, his voice eager. "Did you take it already? Wanna go out to dinner and celebrate?"

Brennan was silent, her eyes filling with tears at his words.

"Bones?"

And then she was sobbing into the phone, mumbling words that made no sense, and he understood that this _wasn't _cause for celebration.

"Oh, Bones…"

"Booth," She said, sniffling loudly. "Will you come over?"

**Arghh, it's so hard to keep Brennan in character! I'll write something and then read it over and be like, "Oh, but would Bones **_**really **_**cry into the phone? She would probably be cool and detached about this, right?" **

**But I couldn't help myself. Reviews, please??**


	3. Comfort

**Alright, here it is. I actually had a bit of trouble deciding what outcome to write, even though the last chapter strongly implied that the test was positive. I don't have an outline or a plan, so I'm pretty much just thinking it up as I go along. I hope you all enjoy what I decided!**

**Also – thanks for all the awesome reviews so far, and for everyone who added this to their Story Alert and/or Fav Stories. It really means a lot :D !!**

**Oh, and thoughts are in italics.**

**CHAPTER THREE**

She answered the door and he was smiling. His smile was sad, almost pitying really, but still her spirits lifted a bit and she was reminded that _no. I am not alone in this. I am not alone._

"I, um, I brought ice cream," He said, lifting up a slightly damp bag. "I thought of getting the coffee-flavored one that you like, but…Ah…."

"Right," Brennan whispered, moving aside and motioning for him to come in. "Thank you."

They were both silent as Brennan pulled out utensils for them to eat with, and as she watched him open the tub of ice cream and pick up a spoon to scoop some into their bowls, she paused and said worriedly, "Wait. Shouldn't we eat it right out of the tub? That's what people do in times of disaster, right? They eat ice cream right out of the container?"

"Uh…" Booth looked up at her, confused as to why she was concerned about something trivial like that. "I don't know, Bones. Do you _want _to eat it right out of the container?"

"I don't know," She shrugged. "When Angela comes over…We always do."

He grinned a bit at the image – Temperance Brennan eating ice cream right out of the tub like some heartbroken teenage girl.

"Alright then. We'll eat it like this."

"Thank you," Brennan said quietly.

"No problem, Bones."

They were silent again. Mostly Booth just watched her, occasionally spooning some of the dessert into his mouth. He knew she felt him staring at her, and as her scoops got quicker and quicker, he knew it was making her nervous.

"Stop, Bones," He placed his hand lightly over her wrist to stop her from bringing the spoon into her mouth. "Just stop."

Temperance sighed, never looking up to meet his eyes. "I don't know what I'm going to do," She admitted.

"You should tell him first. Before going to the doctor, before making any type of decision, you should tell him. He's the father, he deserves to know and to have a say in what you're _both _going to do."

"I…I don't know how to reach him," Brennan confessed tearfully.

He frowned. "You don't have his number or anything?"

"I-I do, but…But he's…He's working now. At sea. I have no idea how to reach him, if it's even _possible _for me to reach him."

"Alright, then…" Booth thought for a moment, "Then…Then I'll look into it for you. Mark, is it? What's his last name?"

"Gaffney. Mark Gaffney," She said, her voice still quiet and hoarse from crying.

"Okay. I'll look into that, and you just…I don't know, make a doctor's appointment, I guess."

Brennan nodded.

"It's going to be alright, Bones," The spoon full of melted chocolate ice cream was still in her hand, and he pried it away gently before taking her hand into his own. "I promise, alright? You know I'll be here for you, and so will Angela and the squints. Your father and Russ, too. Don't worry about it, okay? You're not alone in this."

She nodded quickly, swallowing the massive lump in her throat before letting out a strangled sob.

"Shh, it's alright," He soothed, standing up. He moved closer and hugged her so that her face was pressed up against his stomach, soaking his t-shirt.

"I don't know why I'm crying so much," Brennan exclaimed confusedly, as if angry with herself.

"Maybe it's hormones."

She looked up at him and at his light, teasing smile, and they laughed together as she pulled away, rubbing her eyes with her sleeves. And everything was normal for a moment, just as it always had been.

_I'm not alone._

-----

Brennan woke up the next day with the sheets wrapped tightly around her, uncomfortably so.

"Hmm," She squirmed awkwardly, her hands angrily pushing away the stifling red sheets.

And then in a rush she remembered everything, and Temperance fell back against the bed almost as if the recollection was a physical blow.

Her morning proceeded as usual, except for the constant effort she took to force recent memories out of her mind.

That is, until she had everything ready. Because now it was time to make a call.

"Women's Health Clinic, how may I help you?"

"This is Temperance Brennan, I'd like to make a," Brennan paused, taking in a deep breath before continuing. "I'd like to make a pre-natal appointment with Dr. Kaur."

"Are you a regular patient, Miss Brennan?"

"Dr. Brennan," She corrected automatically. "And yes."

"Alright then, when's a good time for you?"

"Uh…A-as soon as possible."

"Dr. Kaur has an opening at ten thirty today if you'd like."

"Not that soon. Do you have any other openings today?"

"Yes, we have one at five, is that good for you?"

"Yes, thank you."

Brennan hung up quickly without waiting for any confirmation, and headed out to the Jeffersonian.

-----

"Do you think I should tell people?"

"Well hello to you too, Bones," Booth walked in and settled himself at the end of the couch.

"Well do you?"

"I don't know," He shrugged. "If you want to, I guess. You'll have to tell Cam eventually. And eventually other people will notice too."

"Unless I don't let it get that far," She pointed out.

His face fell at her words and he sighed. "Yeah. There's that."

"I don't want a baby, Booth," Brennan said decisively. "It's either that or putting it up for adoption."

"And what about the father?"

"What about the father? The _father _has a job where he's gone, nearly unreachable, for most of the year. And the _father _won't be carrying this child for nine months. And the _father _won't be pushing it out of his-"

"But it's not only your decision!" He yelled, standing up. "Maybe you _are _doing most of the work during the pregnancy, I accept that. But it's not your child any more than it is _his_, Bones, and he deserves a say! You don't know what he'll want. Maybe he'll decide to get a job here! Maybe he'll _want _to be a part of the kid's life, you ever think of that?! Not all guys are irresponsible assholes, you know!"

"I never said anything like that," She said calmly. "But you're right. If he wants to be a part of the baby's life, then I'll have the baby."

"Great," He smiled, relieved.

"Then I can give it over to Mark and never have to think about it again," Brennan shrugged.

Booth stared at her, stunned.

"What?" She asked defensively. "I'm obviously not fit to raise a child. If he wants it, he can have it."

"It's a _baby_, Bones. It's not a…A…"

"A?"

"I don't know! I can't think of anything right now because you're _pissing me off_ so much! But it's. A. Baby! _Your _baby! And you're planning to give it away to somebody you barely know without a second thought! What if he's not fit to be a father, either?"

"Then…Well, then it's back to abortion or adoption, I guess."

Booth sighed and closed his eyes, trying to contain his anger.

"Yeah, Bones," He said, turning away. "Whatever."

**I actually spent about twenty minutes researching if pregnant women could have coffee ice cream or not. I dunno why it was so important to me…I'm trying to get stuff as accurate as possible – I don't know much about pregnancy. So if something's wrong, feel free to tell me, okay? **

**Reviews encourage me to keep writing ;) !**


	4. Information

**Thanks for the reviews :) ! But – I've got like 40 people who added this to their Story Alerts, but only 10 reviews :S …where are you guys?? Don't be shy, now! I'm trying to update this story every third day, so the next post should be up on Monday – hope you enjoy this chapter!**

**CHAPTER FOUR**

Booth was mad at her, she knew. And despite the growing creature in her uterus, Temperance found that his anger at her was the only thing she could focus on. And a part of her was grateful for the distraction; with new trouble to think about her thoughts wouldn't turn to her current condition.

_The zygote isn't even __**his**__, _she thought angrily. _Actually, it may be a fetus already…But still; I can do whatever I damn well want with it. It probably doesn't even have a brain. Or bones!_

She leaned back in the chair and sighed. _So tired…You know, if I put my head in my hands and stare down at some papers, it'll look like I'm thinking hard and no one will notice that I'm really asleep…_

"Bren, you've got to stop this."

Brennan jerked her head up.

"What? I'm awake- fine! I mean fine!"

Angela stared at her friend for a moment, confused. "Were you _sleeping_?"

"No…"

The artist tilted her head and frowned. "Seriously, sweetie? Sleeping on the job? Is there something wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong, Ange," Brennan lied. "I'm just tired. What do I have to stop?"

"This...This, this _Booth _thing! He's always leaving your office, furious! What are you doing with him?!"

"I'm not doing anything! Why do you assume I'm the one to blame?"

"Bren," Angela said, rolling her eyes. "What did _he _do, then?" She continued skeptically.

"He's just…I don't want to talk about it. I have a lot of work to do."

"Oh yeah, you sure seemed busy when I walked in."

"If you know that, why are you still here?" Brennan asked, not looking up from the sheet of notepaper on her desk – the blank one she was just pretending to write in.

"Fine, Bren. Fine."

"Oh, Ange?"

"Yeah?" Angela turned at the door, a hopeful smile on her face.

"I won't be able to make dinner today," Brennan answered, still looking down at the table.

Her friend sighed. "Why, Brennan?" She asked patiently.

"I have an appointment."

"Yes, I pretty much guessed that. What _kind _of appointment?"

"A…" Temperance looked up at this. "A doctor's appointment."

"A doctor's appointment?" The brunette walked back in to stand next to the desk. "Are you sick?"

"No," She answered quickly. "It's just a standard check-up exam."

"Alright," Angela agreed, unconvinced. "Well, call me if anything's up, okay?"

"I will."

-----

There were two obviously pregnant women sitting in the waiting room with her and some other patients. One had a small bump, just large enough to notice that she was pregnant and not just chubby. The other had an enormous belly already, and had needed help from her husband when sitting down.

And Brennan couldn't help but stare at both of them over her magazine. _Will I look like that?_

Her feet tapped at the floor impatiently, waiting for one of the nurses behind the counter to call her name. After calling the clinic again to find out what exactly would be happening during her first prenatal exam, she was even more nervous than she had been this morning.

"Dr. Temperance Brennan?"

She stood up quickly and followed the grinning nurse into an empty exam room.

"Your first prenatal visit, then? You must be excited!"

"I wouldn't say that…" Brennan frowned.

The nurse smiled. "You shouldn't worry. Dr. Kaur should be in soon. Good luck!"

Brennan stood alone in the room for a few minutes before the doctor finally walked in.

"Dr. Brennan, good to see you," She smiled politely after shaking her hand, and gestured at the second chair as she sat down behind the desk. "I understand you're here for a prenatal exam?"

"That's right. I took a home pregnancy test."

"And it was positive?"

"Well, yes," Brennan smiled confusedly. "Or I wouldn't be here."

"Of course," Dr. Kaur chuckled. "Well, before we go any further I'll send you to have blood and urine samples collected so that we can have in confirmed once and for all, then if you're really pregnant you'll come back here to answer some questions for me and have the physical exam."

"I wanted to talk about abortion," She said quickly. "That would be my first choice."

"I see," The doctor sat back against her chair, keeping her face carefully neutral. "I cannot stress enough how many women regret their choice after having an abortion, Dr. Brennan. I believe we should first do the necessary exams and find out how far along you are, then we'll talk about termination options."

After being led to a small cubicle next to Dr. Kaur's office to have her blood taken, then waiting another hour at the reception, Brennan was finally called back into the room to meet with the doctor.

"Well, congratulations," The red-headed woman said, holding up a sheaf of papers and smiling slightly. "You're definitely pregnant."

Temperance kept her silence as she sat down again, and the doctor quickly continued, "Well, I'll need you to answer some questions about your medical history. You know, any medication you're taking, history of disease, etcetera."

Dr. Kaur spent another few minutes jotting down the answers, then stood up and took a white cloth patient gown from a shelf and handed it to Temperance. "I'll step out for a moment while you put this on; you won't need any underwear either."

"Right. Ah, how much longer will this take?"

"About forty minutes, I'd say," The doctor shrugged. "As long as everything is in order."

Brennan trembled as she stripped and put the gown on, the whole thing seeming even more real now that it was confirmed for good. A _baby_. A baby that she had made, a baby that could grow into a toddler and a teenager and an adult – right this second, growing inside of her as she changed her clothing. It was terrifying.

"Dr. Brennan?" There was a knock on the door.

"You can come in," She called back.

-----

It hadn't been as awful as she had expected. The doctor had used a probe of some sort to make sure of how far along she was, and while she couldn't yet see anything on the small monitor she could sometimes detect a very faint heartbeat. Her child's heartbeat.

After verifying that she was seven weeks pregnant, the doctor had calmly broached the topic of abortion. Apparently it could be performed only within the first trimester of pregnancy, so she only had a little less than two months to make her decision.

Brennan tried not to think about it as she drove home, stopping along the way to pick up some Chinese food and juice. _No beer for me. _She sang along to the radio as she drove, finding it not only soothing but also an effective method of keeping unwanted thoughts out of her head.

She had a nearly two months to think about it, after all.

**There ya go. This chapter felt pretty long to me, even though it's pretty much the same size as the others. Maybe it's because I had to stop and research pregnancy stuff every other paragraph. Seriously, how can preggos keep all this stuff in their head?! I'm feeling sleepy and I've only known it all for a couple hours. I can't imagine nine months of all this clutter of info jumbling around in my head. **

**Anyway, please review! Reading what you guys have to say always makes my day better. :)**


	5. Revelations

**Thanks so much for the awesome reviews for the last chapter! You all rock! I know some people are a little bit upset that Brennan isn't pregnant with Booth's baby. I'm sorry to have to disappoint you, but I am absolutely not going to put in a twist – you know, a Booth and Brennan somehow realize that they slept together two months ago and forgot and the baby is actually his type thing. No to that. It's Deep-Sea Welder's kid, you can be sure. Every baby story out there has Booth and Brennan having sex in Vegas and an accidental pregnancy, or her wanting him to donate sperm for a baby. I want this to be a little different than all the other stuff out there. You understand, right ;) ? Thanks guys. Oh, and sorry that this chapter is a little late; I took a trip and had no time to write. I made it extra-long and fluffy for you. Enjoy! **

**Thoughts in italics.**

**CHAPTER FIVE**

He should call her, Booth knew. This was _her _pregnancy, _her _child, and deep down he knew he was just making it all harder for her by not supporting her decisions.

_But she's so…Insane! Yeah, insane. I just don't understand how someone so freaking smart can be so dense about things. She was so great with Andy that time…She can't possibly still be that opposed to having children…_

He'd just go to her place. Right, that would work. If he called her, she'd just answer him evasively; pretend she was forgiving him just so she didn't have to deal with him. But if he just showed up, maybe with some Thai, some wine…_No, no wine. Soda? Can pregnant women drink soda? I better go with juice. _

So that's where Booth ended up thirty minutes later. Awkwardly knocking on Brennan's apartment door while juggling two bagfuls of Thai food and a bottle of organic grape juice. _For five dollars a bottle it better prevent cancer!_

"Bones, open up!" He hollered, thumping the door with his shoulder.

"Booth?" She opened the door slowly, looking confused. "What are you doing here? I was in the shower."

"Oh," He blushed when he saw her wearing only a bathrobe, her hair dripping. "Sorry Bones. I just wanted to see if you were up for some food," Booth held up the bags with a hopeful smile.

"I…" Brennan stared at the bags, puzzled, and remembered that she had picked up food along the way home. But after a few seconds of consideration, curiosity about why he was here got the better of her and she opened the door wider. "Okay. Let me just get dressed."

"Take your time, Bones," He said, moving into the kitchen to get them cups and utensils.

Brennan walked out a few minutes later, wearing brown yoga pants and a tank top, tying her hair back into a ponytail. "Why are you here?" She asked directly.

Booth shrugged. "I just…I shouldn't have yelled before. I know this is hard for you…I wanted to say I'm sorry," He smiled.

She smiled back, chuckling. "You're forgiven. Now what did you get? I'm starving."

A few minutes later they were sitting at the table, chewing in silence.

"I had a doctor's appointment today," Brennan declared.

"Oh? What did he say?"

"She."

"Okay, what did she say?"

"I'm seven weeks pregnant."

He was quiet, waiting to see if she would say anything else.

"I had an ultrasound," She continued.

Booth grinned at that. "Really? Wow, that's awesome, Bones. I was never there when Rebecca got hers. What did you see?"

Brennan smiled at his enthusiasm and just for a moment this was exactly what she wanted – having dinner and juice with her FBI partner and telling him about the baby growing inside of her. And for that moment it didn't seem so insane and wrong that she was pregnant, and they just beamed at each other over their cartons of food as she answered. "I didn't get to see anything, really. It's just about…" She raised her hand and held her fingers about half an inch apart. "This big right now. And it wouldn't really look like anything, even if I could see it."

And before she could stop herself, she added, "Maybe you should come with me next time."

They both froze a second after her suggestion, staring at each other uncomfortably.

Booth was the first to recover. He smiled softly at her and shrugged, trying to make light of the veiled request. "I'd like to." _Does this mean she's keeping the baby? Does it? Don't ask, don't ask…_

"Does this mean you're keeping – "

"I haven't decided yet," Brennan said quickly, before he could finish. "I have two months."

"Okay."

He didn't push, knowing how hard this whole situation was for her. "Are you having morning sickness?"

"That's a very misleading name, you know," She shook her head. "It can actually happen at any time of the day. But no, I'm not. The doctor said it could still start, though."

"Maybe you won't get it at all, if you've been lucky so far."

Brennan opened her mouth, about to launch into an explanation that it had nothing to do with luck, and actually a lot of women didn't experience morning sickness, but he was quicker.

"What about cravings? Are you having any?"

She shook her head at this too. "No. My appetite has increased considerably, though. Apparently it's to be expected."

"Oh."

They were quiet for a few minutes, eating their Thai food in comfortable silence.

"Are you going to tell people?"

Temperance thought about the question for a moment and then nodded decisively. "I will, yes. I should tell Angela. Then…Well, if…" Both of them understood the unspoken phrase.

_If I keep the baby. _"I might tell Cam. And I guess people will start to notice."

"Will you be able to find out the sex?" He moved on quickly.

"The doctor is usually able to find out around the eighteenth week, but only if the baby's positioning is right. But I could find out as early as the fifteenth or sixteenth week."

They didn't mention that there was a very slim chance of her finding out within the next two months.

"Are you hoping for one or the other?" Booth asked curiously, grinning.

"I don't know," She shrugged. "It doesn't really make a difference to me. Are _you _hoping for one or the other?"

He shrugged too. "A little girl would be sweet. Can you imagine that? A little Bones." Booth grinned. _I don't sound like an expectant father right now. This is a perfectly normal conversation. _

She rolled her eyes good-naturedly. "Our children would probably spend some time together. Wouldn't Parker like a boy to play with?"

"Yeah, that'd be pretty great too," His smile was far-off as he imagined him and Bones sitting at the diner. A young girl, looking exactly like her mother, sat in Bones' lap and gigged at a funny face he made while Brennan rolled her eyes as she had just done in real life. The fantasy was soon replaced by one of him and Parker helping a dark-haired, blue-eyed little boy throw a football while Bones sat cheering at the sidelines.

Booth quickly shook himself out of the daydream and moved on to another topic. "I did some digging on Deep-Sea Welder. Couldn't find anything – but I'll look into it more. I'm pretty busy with the RICO case."

"Oh, how is that going?"

"Great," He grinned. "It should be over soon."

They talked for the rest of the evening, mostly about work, and the pregnancy didn't come up again.

-----

"Angela?" Two weeks later, Brennan walked slowly into her friend's office. "May I talk to you?"

The woman looked up from the computer and smiled. "Hey, sweetie. What's up?"

"I…I'd like to tell you something."

Angela swiveled her chair around and faced Brennan, who was now sitting on the couch nervously. She frowned, eyes widening. "What is it? Is it serious?"

"Well, yes. It's quite serious, I'd say."

"Oh my God, Bren," The artist looked dumbfounded. "Is it really bad?"

Brennan tilted her head, confused. "Well…It's not _bad_, exactly. But it isn't very good either."

"Okay…" Angela nodded, still looking worried. "What is it?"

"I'm pregnant."

Ange was silent for all of one second, her eyes large. Then she jumped up and went to hug her friend, smiling softly. "Oh, sweetie…Whose is it?"

"Mark's. From a few months ago?"

"Yeah."

"I'm nine weeks along."

"Wow," Angela shook her head, shocked. "You've been to the doctor, right? You're taking care of yourself?"

"Yes, I already went. I have another appointment in two weeks."

"Wow," She said again. "Do you want me to go with you? Have you told the guy?"

"No, I'm…Not sure how to get in touch with him. He's at sea. Booth said he wants to go with me."

"To the doctor's appointment? Really?"

"Yes. I mentioned that I had an ultrasound and he was interested. I believe it's because he never got to go with Rebecca when she was pregnant. Since Mark and I aren't together and Booth and I see each other regularly, chances are he'll adopt a father-figure sort of role to my child." She shrugged. "That is, if I decide to keep it."

"You think you might not keep it?" Angela frowned.

"I don't know yet," Brennan said, sighing. "I don't know."

**Alright, that's it. Reviews, please :D ! Maybe if you guys are all nice to me I'll make the next update as long as this one. **

**Thanks!**


	6. Acknowledging

**Thanks for the great reviews for the last chapter :) . As promised, this one is extra long. And packed with sadness and melancholy, for your reading pleasure. Enjoy!**

**CHAPTER SIX**

"I suppose I shouldn't get attached to you."

It had been a week since Brennan had told Angela, and for the first time in a very long time she had taken a personal day off work. She didn't know why exactly, but waking up that morning and lying in bed, it had felt right. Brennan had been absently running her hands over her stomach, and had been startled to feel a bump so tiny that she was sure now that she had imagined it. _I had just woken up! I should not be showing at ten weeks. _But at the time, she had sat up, shocked, and ran to the mirror to check. And for a few moments, standing barefoot in her bathroom with her tank top up under her breasts, Temperance had been so _sure _she could see something. And as she felt the familiar tingling of tears behind her eyes as she stared at herself, she knew that she wouldn't be able to focus on work today.

"Not yet, anyway. I'm sure I'll become very much attached to you if I make the decision to let you stay in there for the full nine and a half months, I can promise you that. I know your inner ear hasn't even started forming so it's irrational of me to think you can hear me. Still," She shrugged. "It can't hurt, right? I've done extensive research on pregnancy, I'll have you know. And a lot of websites tell me that speaking to the baby, even if it can't hear me, is very therapeutic."

"If you could hear me at all, and if you had basic vocabulary skills, you might be wondering why I'm reluctant to keep you."

"It's nothing personal, really, it's not. I just…" Brennan sighed and rolled her eyes at the ceiling, wondering why she was even doing this. This pregnancy was really throwing her off her game… "I just never really wanted children."

"I could be a relatively good mother to you, I think. I'm financially stable. I've been told I have a protective streak, which would be conducive to taking care of a child. I'm also extremely smart, and I'm sure I'd be able to pass that on to you. You'd be very successful in life," She smiled brightly then, rubbing her stomach, but the smile fell off her face quickly, replaced by a confused frown. "But…It's the more affectionate aspects of parenting that I'm not comfortable with. Don't get me wrong," She started, and then paused again. _Oh God, it can't even hear me… _But Brennan continued, unable to stop herself from voicing the thoughts aloud. "I'd love you. I'm not incapable of that, no matter how frigid or unfeeling people think I am," Her voice cracked a little, and as she felt the uncomfortable wetness of tears rolling down her neck, she wondered how long ago she had started crying. "I would love you very much."

"My parents, your grandparents…They left me when I was a teenager. And my older brother, Russ, he left too. I don't put much stock in psychology," She sniffled. "But I can understand that my…Shortcomings in social and personal situations may stem from being…From being…Abandoned at a young age. I can understand how that would be possible, even…Even if psychology is…" She drew in a deep breath of air and exhaled, but it ended up coming out more like a sob. "Psychology is unpredictable and, and…And uncertain. You should know that," Brennan patted her stomach, her voice soft and teacher-like.

"And you should also know that despite how much I would love you, how much I _do _love you," She admitted. "All children deserve more than a cold, emotionally distant parent. I would never be able to show you affection in normal ways, in ways that other parents do, and I don't want to put you through that. I would never be able to…To take you out for ice cream just for the sake of it. Booth does that with Parker, sometimes. I know because he told me. He's such a good father," She choked at the image of her partner and sat up, trying to calm herself. Her breath was coming in short gasps now, and tears were rolling down her face more quickly than she could wipe them away. "I would never be able to cook you your favorite dinner for no reason other than the fact that I love you, because I just don't do those types of things."

"My mom used to do that," Brennan whispered after being silent for a few minutes.

She lied back against the couch again, forcing herself to take in deep, slow breaths and finally putting a stop to the tears.

"That's why."

-----

A few hours later she woke up in the same position to a loud, unrelenting knocking on her door. Groaning, she sat up and put a hand to her forehead, trying to rub away the stuffiness she felt in her head. Another insistent knock and Brennan stood up, walking towards the door.

She was just a few steps away from it when she felt the sudden lurch of her stomach and the bile rapidly rising up her throat. Temperance gulped and brought a hand to her mouth, running to the bathroom and throwing up her breakfast into the toilet bowl. Early that morning, when she had still been feeling something other than gloomy and miserable, she had taken a bit of time to make herself pancakes. Seeing them now, inside the porcelain bowl, she wondered why she had even made the effort.

The knocking at the door was now joined by a frantic voice. "Bones, if you don't open the door right this second I will break it down, I swear to God!"

"I'll be right there!" She shouted, her voice croaky from all the crying earlier.

"Where the fuck are you, Bones?! I'm going to kill you when I see you, I swear! Open the door _now_!" Booth continued, obviously not hearing her hoarse yelling.

Brennan sighed and stood up shakily, grabbing her a washcloth and wiping her mouth while flushing the toilet. She walked quickly into the living room, ignoring the fact that she was dressed only in plaid pajama bottoms and a thin white top, knowing that if she didn't open the door soon Booth _would _kick it down.

"What do you want?" She asked briskly, throwing open the door.

"What do I _want_?!" He walked past her into the apartment and looked at her incredulously. "Where the hell is your cell phone, Bones? And why did you take so long to open the door?! I was worried sick!"

"And I was actually _being _sick, emptying my stomach into the toilet bowl. I don't understand what I've done to give you the impression that you're allowed to come over at any time and pummel my door while screaming out in the hallway. I have neighbors, you know," She threw down the washcloth and walked back into the bathroom to brush her teeth. The bathroom door was left open, and Booth stood at the doorway looking at her.

"I'm sorry. I was just worried," He said, watching her spit out the toothpaste into the sink and then rinse her mouth with water. "You never take days off work."

She nodded, her anger fading at his soft concern. _Mood swings, _her still-annoyed mind thought.

"I just…" She shrugged, walking out and heading into her bedroom. "I just didn't feel like going in today. Did you need me for a case?"

He sat on her unmade bed while she disappeared into the walk-in closet.

"No. I just wanted to see if you were okay. So, morning sickness finally kicking in, is it?"

"Yes."

"Was this the first time?"

"Yes."

"Are you still feeling sick?"

"A bit."

Booth sighed, annoyed at her vague answers. He lied back on the bed, his legs still dangling over the edge.

"Do you want me to go out to the drugstore and pick you up something?"

Brennan walked out and frowned as she stared at him, sprawled out on her bed.

"No, that's alright," She shrugged and lied down next to him, shifting up so that she was lying fully in the bed and his head was level with her stomach. "I'm better."

"Good. So, what did you do today? Besides being sick?"

"Nothing really. I had breakfast. Then I just…" Brennan paused, blushing.

"What?" Booth asked curiously.

"I…I talked a bit. To the baby."

"Really?" He rolled over and put his chin in his hands, facing her. "It can hear you?"

"No, I just…I read that it can be…Beneficial. Soothing. For me. I thought I'd try."

"What did you say?"

"I…"

He sensed her reluctance to tell him and quickly said something else. "Did you talk to it about me?"

"I mentioned you and Parker," Brennan confessed. "I said you were a good father."

Booth smiled softly at her and nodded. "Thanks, Bones."

"So what else did you say about me?" He grinned after a few seconds of silence.

"Nothing," She chuckled. "Why would I talk about you so much?"

"Well, I'll be a big part of the baby's life, you know."

"I suppose."

They both ignored the fact that they weren't even sure it would get that far.

"And Parker, too. They're gonna be almost like siblings, our kids. It's gonna be great."

She smiled and nodded. "Parker will be a good older brother. He's a great boy."

"We could take them places together. I could take them to football and hockey games," He suggested excitedly. "And you could take them to the boring museum places. Parker loves that," Booth rolled his eyes. "I think he's spent too much time at the Jeffersonian."

"Hey, museums are not boring!"

Booth chuckled and nodded. "I guess not all of them. You know what you should get? One of those baby carrying things," He gestured to his chest. "Those things that strap on, you know? I think those are great. Then it would be easier to carry stuff. You'll have to carry a lot of stuff, with a baby. Like a diaper bag, and your own bag too."

"I don't want to carry a diaper bag," She wrinkled her nose.

"I could carry the diaper bag for you, when I'm with you," He nodded. "The guest room would make a great nursery, you know. It's very well-lit, and it's close to your bedroom…You wouldn't have to get a new place. This is a great place."

"I do like this place," Brennan agreed. "There's that crevice in the wall of the guest room, the one opposite to the window? It would be a good place for a crib, I think."

"Yeah, it would," He smiled. "You should paint it, though. White is boring. Maybe green – Green is pretty gender-neutral, right? Or maybe orange. Light orange."

"I like both of those," She thought for a moment. "Maybe it could be both. Green and orange stripes. What do you think?"

"It's great. We could ask Angela to help. She's good with the painting stuff, right? Maybe we could ask her to do a design over the crib. The baby's name, or some sort of drawing…"

"Yeah…"

And if they were a little bit startled by the fact that they were acting as if the baby was _theirs _instead of half-Mark Gaffney – then they didn't let it show. They just drifted off, staring at the ceiling, and almost at the same time they both realized that it might never come to that. Because in just a little over a month the baby might not be here anymore, and life would be back to normal. And there would be no taking the kids to games or museums, and no buying cribs, and no painting the guest room and asking Angela for help. Nothing.

**Okay, maybe the bit in the beginning with her talking to the baby was a little out of character? It felt very right to me, though…And everyone is out of character in pregnancy; all those hormones dancing around. Anyway, she'll make her decision soon, don't worry. I just want to explore this uncertainty a bit more – it's fun (in a depressing way). Reviews, please? Thanks for reading!**


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